Sunday, August 7, 2011

I Would FUCK you, but that would mean You're something near Human

The circadian rhythms of despair, hollowness, and anger oscillate me. Blending together into the sub-hues of languor, abandon and vitriol, I'm not a robot but I'm not really human. The drugs are more real than me; a desperate attempt to submit a plea. I am fighting just to stay alive - I am just fighting to stay INSIDE. I would eat you but then your demons wouldn't have a home - I would kill you but then you'd be left ALONE. I went into the canvas store and saw you all over. Let me make you as black and blue AS YOU MADE ME. Excuse me while I see what sort of hue BEST around your eyes SUITS YOU.

I'd fuck you but that would mean you're something near human. And I'd never want to leave you ASSUMING. Knife and easy - down the street. Just think of all the ASSHOLES you're gonna meet. If you were a drug, AND PASSED AROUND, I'd pass you down to the soiled ground. I'd abandon you and become more tightly wound.

I want you like I want a hole in my CONDOM.

Now I find that I never knew who the make-up smeared clown named Asa Hollow was. But neither did he. Which part of me is he? Are all of them? Are none? What do I lack that renders me unable to be human? What am I clinging to that prevents my departure to being mechanical? Did I ever even have a soul? With one would I even be whole? Do I deserve one if I don't have one now? What is the difference between always giving in and never giving in?

I'd debase myself to FREEBASE you; that means I need a base to lower before I can really even blow her. You're a ray of blow - if I looked for your end I'd still be looking. If god is how, I am the why. If god is the breath, I am the sigh. If bleeding were holy, I'd be the pope - I'd make the sabbath a day for dope.

Each scar is a time you said 'go to hell' - you didn't count on me actually GOING.

-M