Tuesday, November 16, 2010

"Disintegration - I'm taking it in stride."

The title of this post is Patrick Bateman narrating in American Psycho. I can't help but share the sentiment.

The slow peeling and healing of scabs and scars, the mind becoming disconnected from reality, from others - the alienation is just the inexorable process that my mind constantly gravitates to. Maybe others exist out there that are fading away, like me. That doesn't matter. The existence of another who realizes they cannot connect with anyone does not help another who cannot connect with anyone. There is no warm, kindred feeling - if anything, it adds to the sentiment of suffering being corollary to existing.

I have indulged in excess, fed the monsters of hedonism and escapism inside. I have found my pleasure. It is likely not yours, but that gives no epistemological justification for yours being better or more moral. Besides, you can't convince an amoral person to believe in morals; we are fundamentally different from you, at least in that aspect. You can lead a horse to water, and you can shove its head in the water to try and force it to drink until it drowns, but you can't force it to actually drink.

I shall close with two quotations - one from the author, one from a character in his book. On the surface, maybe they don't seem related. But to me they are. Figure out your own connection.

"Our lives are not all interconnected. That theory is a crock. Some people truly do not need to be here."
- Bret Easton Ellis

"Greed is good. Sex is easy. Youth is forever."
 - The Informers - Bret Easton Ellis

I came for a good time, not a long one.